Point of No Return

author’s note:

“This hour I tell things in confidence,
  I might not tell everybody but I will tell you.”
                --  Walt Whitman


POINT

The tree dares me
at the same time
that it inspires me

to climb--coaxing me up--
assuring me of the safety
of its arms.  Seeming to speak
of a home hidden
within its umbrella.

A point of sunlight
through the leaves
encourages me
as I grapple my way
from limb to limb
--my clouded desire
   ever more urgent
   as my fear ascends.

But all the while
--silently, secretly--
the tree continues to grow:
its movement as deceptive
as the slow hand
of a clock

but then...

the top leaves lift their hands
to join with the hands of a cloud

and the branches become a bell
rung by the wind

--the sound: a flock
spreading in all directions--
         singing of the splash sweetness
         of birth release--

but with the undertow of a moan so low
one can only feel this sound
inside the belly.  The moan so low

the earth shifts
in its depths.  Something in the earth
expands, pushes--pulls--
its way upward.  A fire energy
coming for me--yes--the earth always
wants us back.

But though I realize
the earth fire will meet
the white sky at the focal point
of this climber,
I can’t stop,
I can’t go back,
I can’t

imagine what will happen
when the two collide
within me

...however...
I do believe I now know
why I was fool enough
to sink my fingertips into
this bark
and work and strain
when there seemed to be
little real advantage
in such effort:

I have no point
unless I test myself
by trusting
an invisible net
that offers
an overwhelming
--terrifying--
promise of security.

© 2009, Michael R. Patton
earnest audio
new steps